MIAMI, FL – FEBRUARY 19: Chiquis Marin attends the 2015 Premios Lo Nuestros Awards at American Airlines Arena on February 19, 2015 in Miami, Florida.
(Photo by John Parra/Getty Images For Univision) " data-medium-file="https://heavyeditorial.files.wordpress.com/2015/04/chiquisrivera.jpg?
To this day, my mother, in her heart, thinks I had something with Esteban.’Chiquis admitted the fight followed by her mother’s death has left her feeling extremely fragile, explaining: ‘We had no communication, absolutely nothing.
I didn’t have the opportunity to sit down with my mother and explain things.
“For what he did to me as a little girl, I forgave him a thousand times.
But it would be a betrayal of my mother if I sought out the friendship of a man who never even sent me a message of condolence [after Jenni died],” writes Chiquis, who spoke out about the abuse in 1997.
All I remember is closing my eyes, tensing up my arms and thinking: 'If I don't put up too much of a fight, then he'll be done with me sooner.'"Despite the abuse, Chiquis, now 29, says that she doesn’t feel hatred toward her father.
He mentioned that she would be nice to him most of the times, but she would go through aggressive phases where she would be verbally abusive “She was nice to me, but sometimes she would treat me like she used to be: aggressive in the way she talked, in the way she did things.
Sometimes I would think about doing things, then I would do them, and sometimes she would get mad at me for it.”Loaiza also mentioned that he hasn’t read Chiquis book, and that he hasn’t been in touch with any members of the Rivera family.
Every day I wake up and go to bed with this pain, if it weren’t for Johnny and Jennica [her siblings], I don’t know what would become of me.’Speaking about the break-up of her marriage to Loaiza, her third husband, she said: 'I can't get caught up in the negative because that destroys you.
Perhaps trying to move away from my problems and focus on the positive is the best I can do.In the description of the book Chiquis wrote: This is the first time Chiquis reveals that she was molested by a woman when she was a little girl. In the book, Chiquis explains how the woman tricked her into playing games that led to sexual touching and she felt confused because at the same time she was being abuse by two separate people — an unidentified woman and her father.