Dating an older woman is quite the rage these days.
As a woman over 35, I’ve never felt more desired by men in their late 20s and early 30s than I do now—moreso even than when I was that age. Pay no attention to the ol’ elbow-jabbing, wink-wink idea that cougars* are “more likely to put out and pay for everything.” Meh, that may be a reason a naïve man attempts to score with an older lady, but it’s hardly the reason a smart man enters a relationship with one.
But, after talking with dating coaches David Wygant and Lisa Copeland, it occurs to me that women our age may be just as biased against older men as they seem to be against us.
After all, most men over 60 don’t look like George Clooney, just like most of us don’t look like Jane Seymour.
For as long as there has been recorded history, it has been completely acceptable for an older man to date a younger woman. The facts are that a man can father a child until he takes his very last breath on his deathbed – whether he is fifteen or ninety-five. Men’s sperm is endless and maybe a bit slower after aging, but typically, they are able to impregnate a woman forever. When a younger woman sees an older woman with a younger guy, they probably scratch their heads wondering why any guy would want to be with someone older.
But now, a new phenomenon is emerging where older women dating younger men seems to be the “in” thing.
I was married once before, to a man five years my senior.
After 12 increasingly dreary years capped by a wrenching divorce, I couldn't imagine why women in my situation (childless divorcées) complained about the prospect of reentering single life. Wasn't finally having some laughs, romance, and excitement the way to take the "crisis" out of "midlife"?
) Others say that older men are only interested in dating women one third their age.
Parties, rock concerts, nightclubs—I dated the way I should have when I was younger: for fun, without an eye toward marriage. During that time, when I was in my late 30s, I made an important sociological discovery: Men over 40 are profoundly different from those under 35, and it's not just their hairlines.